Mercy, whas' wrong 'round heah?
Yep...Need a new post. But...
does anyone really wanna see them yellow roses bursting in bloom? Or, that the hibiscus at the east gate looks neon against a stormy sky? Doubt it.
Well, what about what'cha cookin'?
Steel cut oatmeal? Which boiled over like Vesuvius on the floor of the microwave when I stepped out to smell the roses.
Serves ya' right--Luther has told ya' that the reason dread diseases is on the rise is on account of folks microwavin' the life outa their food. Oatmeal? Gick!
Uncle's in the woods, I'se fightin' a spring cold, an' thas' all the energy fer cookin' I'se got, sorry to say. But mah point is, thar's no post in that.
Wanna' show 'em the bounty from the garden?
What "bounty"? One cucumber an' one tomato?
(well, why'nt ya' throw that forest of fresh basil in the photo?)
Thar's always what ya' is readin', right?
Heh. How interested does ya' think folks is in human trafficking an' black market chillen'? This current assignment ain't exactly Saturday mornin' fare.
Not that. What about Uncle's book?
Double heh. "Uncle's"? He doan read nuthin' other than the paper lest I pre-read it an' say it's worth his time. I oughta charge him for this service. Help me think of an equitable fee. Technically, they's mah books that Uncle reads.
Youse a little prissy on the topic of books, aint'cha? All I meant wuz, tell 'em about that cowboy book.
Oh. Yep. Thang is, ain't never read Homer Hickam a'fore. Reckon I doan trust him--the name sounds like a spoof to me. So do this plot: Cowboys, homicide detectives an' dinosaurs. Really?
The guy better be good to make these topics stick together. Do it sound like a literary version of CHOPPED? Ya' know--chefs open their mystery baskets an' haul out weird ingredients that they must turn into a winnin' dish: Kelp, licorice an' Kangaroo kidneys. The chef that sticks these ingredients together in a memorable dish wins. If ole' Homer makes dinosaurs an' cowboys stick to a homicide, I'll be back to tell ya'.
Nice basil. Youse cranky today. Nuthin' suits ya'. Could jes' post a link to that Pinterest thang youse been sucked into.
Mercy Maud! Doan git me started on that time thief! I ain't happy that PamOKC, Boxer-Babe, Chick9, an' Moi done lured me into this vortex.
Uhmmm... startin' to see yore dilemma. Wait! Post about yore trip up to the mountains. About all the purty spring flowerin' trees, rushing waterfalls, an' mountain life.
Nope. I'se done that one already --a few years back. We went to the same places. Nuthin' new. 'Cept it's still jes' as heartbreakin' beautiful.
Ya' know what? I gives up. Ain't nuthin' ya' got worth sharing.
Well, I doan mind sayin', "I told ya' so." Now lemme git on back to bed. Uncle will be home tomorry, an' oatmeal woan do fer him. I got this one day to lay low, cain't spare nary a minute of it.
* * *
What spoof name would ya' choose fer yoreself iffin' youse an author of novels?
If y'all could pack the CHOPPED basket, what 4 ingredients would ya put in 'em?
* * * *
As a blog anniversary nod to Boxer-Babe, I adopted her former "shadow boxing" format of arguing wif' mahself. I still think it one of the most amusin' methods I'se seen yet. Happy Bloggerversary, Boxer!!