Fashion Backward

Fashion ain't frivolous, as some might think. While most of ya'll assume fashion began wif' Eve, it were akshully Adam who began the embellishment of yore basic tiger skin toga. Spend a soupcon of time in any moosem of ancient weapons an' see how a plain javelin is a rareity. No, chillen's, what ya'll will find is exquisitely designed, finely wrought instruments of of persuasion an' befittin' attire to complete the image of soldier/sire/seigneur.

The male propensity fer peacockiness of course was meant to convey prowess (handy fer the wooin' of women An' the whomping of enemy egos).

By the time history relegated the King to foppish window dressin', he were sportin' not boots but high heels--a trend we can lose in the mists of the past as fer as Aunty is concerned.

While some done reasonably figgered that heels for men were in the same category as wigs fer men--to give height and hair whar' thar' warn't much--historians think tat fer Western Men of Substance heels was akin to the Chinese fat belly--a sign of leisure and plenty. Let's face it folks, a fella in high heels cain't exactly chase down a dragon and stomp the stuffin' outa the beast.

Them high heels fer Kings and cohorts was a means to sayin', "I doesn't do no sweaty work---summon mah henchmen forthwith!" Others make a point that might git right to the heart of it-- heels for men and women since Pharaoh was a baby is an indicator of status, literally, "I'se higher than you."

Mebbe. Thang is, platforms slipped over the soles was used by all manner of blokes to keep they "good" shoes outa the pig plop until they arrived in the baronial hall whether baron or butcher. (thas not to say that Moi cain't have a pair of Jimmy's Gladiator platforms!)

All this I mention jes' so the fellas readin' this post woan groan an' think this heah is another girly show of clothes and shoes.

The gurus of personal persuasion insist we have jes' three seconds to leave our mark on the brain of another human. Three seconds.

In that amount of time youse givin' visual cues what total up to the all important First Impression.

Or none. Spies, ya' recall, work hard at givin' no cues an' lookin' like beige paint on dirty walls. In that blink of time your status, education, health, age, profession, personality, and a zillion of minor distinctions as to region, ethnicity, clan, tribe is noted by the fella that jes' shook yore hand. His brain is whirrin' at light-speed collatin' and tabulatin' so he can figger out whar' ya fit in the world, how ya fit relative to him, what ya might do fer him, what ya might want from him, an what his strengths to yore weaknesses are and vicey-versa.

What folks see first is faces an posture, followed by clothes an' adornments--or lack thar' of. I 'se inordinately fond of the stories if cracker folk who fool them city slickers, when the latter invest too much faith inwhat he thinks he sees in a dressed down good ole boy. They's particular clues we'uns have amongst ourselves that doan fit no mold, so it's roarin' good fun when a newcomer to our parts thinks he done sized up the lay of the land..then tumbles into a sinkhole. (do NOT confuse "cracker" wif' "redneck"...thas' whole 'nother post)

All of the above is by way of settin' the stage fer Madame Gres. (See Mute Monday in preceding post).

This French designer swathed great bodies and famous names from the 30s through the 1980s. Durin' the 70s my own mama's stacks fashion magazines and the contents of her closet meant she could go from plantin' pansies to presentation balls--in two hours. The transformation was always surreal. (Not unlike James Bond changing a tire an not mussin' up his cuffs.) To mah certain knowedge thar' was precious few designer frocks in mama's closet, a vintage Hattie Carnegie comes to mind--but in her sewing area thar' were patterns sold by Vogue wif' the famous Madame Gres silhouette (Jackie O wore Gres).

Gres knew the feminine form thanks to her first passion, sculpture. An' her famous gowns never failed to entice with a fluidity that ooozed of feminine mystery.

MYSTERY. Madonna doan have none. Britney doan have none. Paris has minus none.

Ladies, fer Maud's sake, leave a poor fella somethin to wonder about, somethin' to work fer....wear a few inches more fabric an' less gew-gaws so that in that first three seconds ya' ain't givin' away the farm. We ladies ought not arrange ourselves so that we's a book thas' read in jes' three seconds. Intrigue ought to be one of the responses--even if yore fella jes' seen ya at breakfast.

Seems to me that designers of old knew more about the space between he an' she and the glory of it. Perhaps that explains the new passion fer vintage look in modern fashioon.


moi said...

Excellent post! Yes, men started this. Louis XIV anyone? At any rate, I'm planning a post of my own on the subject sometime soon. And I don't care what K9 says, those shoes are FAB.

Anonymous said...

"propensity fer peacockiness"

fishy said...

Aunty Belle,
Does you wears the Jimmy Gladiators wif yore batiste?

Grat post, loved me that history lesson on the peacock boys keepin their pants outta the "pig plop".

Speaking of mamas, I has me a fine one who has a well defined since of style. We didn't always live in a place where real fashion could be bought so my Mam would check her magazines n such and draw herself a pattern on the backs of the brown paper grocery bags and make herself some high stylin fashion. She were a marvel at it...
unfortunately I didn't git that articular DNA package!

Don't think she ever had any of those Gladiator shoe styles but she put her tiny little Aunt Pitty Pat feets in the highest heeled shoes ever! Course she had the hat, the bag and the jewelry too!

Truth is, to my eyes, Jackie O never did look as good as my own Mama.

Gnomeself Be True said...

I can hardly think the word "style" without thinking "...over substance."
I understand the social aspects of the thing, but I still despise the fop without reservation.
Fashion is advertisement. I've never been much of a salesman.
Men advertise their wealth and virility. I've always figured if it was wealth a woman wanted, I'd rather she looked somewhere else so we both would not be disapointed. As for virility...well, that's just obvious. :-)
What are women selling? Hmmmm.
A great many of them are selling the idea that they are sexually available. That's always been the basic currency.
Imagine my disapointment to find that display to be largely about power and that the availability usually did not mean "avialable to me."

h said...

Wow. I actually LIKED this post quite a bit. Thanks for mixing in some Science, Philosophy and History!

Most Boudreaux jokes just pick on Boudreaux but I like the few where Ole Boudreaux and Alphonse outwit the city-slicker.

moi said...

Iamnot. So, what would you have us do, then? Run around naked? Uh, let me rephrase that.

Uhm . . . okay, you're a political conservative, so let's couch this in conservative terms.

Saying that there is something unsubstantial about style, fashion, looking your best is like saying there's such a thing as too much profit. That we can only go "so far" before things get out of hand.

But what is out of hand and who, exactly, decides?

Is a woman who lets her hair hang greasy and limp instead of colored and styled more "substantial" than a woman who spends $200 a month on the upkeep of her head?

How about shoes? Do wearers of thick soled loafers have more integrity than the woman who wears a pair of high heels?

What about comfort? Do you think that, in the name of comfort, it's okay if someone wears sweat pants to a funeral?

Why do some people insist that what is on the surface doesn't in any way reflect what is underneath? To me, it's a knee jerk opinion.

R.Powers said...

"(do NOT confuse "cracker" wif' "redneck"...thas' whole 'nother post)"

Thank you.

I await that post.

This one was fascinating.

Edith said...

I heart fashion. New, old, weird, modest, bright, dark, pattern, plain. I think life's a never ending fashion show.

Thanks for the kind words. I love to write reviews of artist I listen to, concerts I see and books I read :)

Anonymous said...

IAMNOT did not read this far?

"leave a poor fella somethin to wonder about, somethin' to work fer....wear a few inches more fabric an' less gew-gaws so that in that first three seconds ya' ain't givin' away the farm"

Anonymous said...

I also loved this line "leave a poor fella somethin to wonder about, somethin' to work fer....wear a few inches more fabric an' less gew-gaws so that in that first three seconds ya' ain't givin' away the farm"

Bravo Aunty B. You should send a copy of this to Britney, Paris and Co and maybe they can learn something from that great Southern education.

Aunty Belle said...

hey hey...those shoes is YOU wif' bells!



Welcome aboard full blogger mania...ya doan sew? I doan much --but yore mama sounds like a fine lady.


wha' ? Ya doan want it too e asy does ya? Jes' enough...but I knows yore score so I see's whar' ya's comin' from.

I'se jes' askin' if all in, all out, (hehe) does ya prefer a bit of mystery to discover, or does ya want a see through window?

Troll-Man, darlin'

Share that Boudreaux and Alphonse joke wif us!

MOI, second round?

Ya wrote:
Why do some people insist that what is on the surface doesn't in any way reflect what is underneath?

Yep,thas' a good ? folks, what do ya say to that question??

Florida Cracker, Howdy neighbor

I could prolly write that Redneck /cracker post quicker iffin' I'se fortified wif some gumbo. : )

Short? hey!!

I think youse on the money--fashion is cultural--says a lot about who we is, doan it?

When I was a babe chick, why, I had a hankerin' fer a gown that was loosely based on the military officer look--lemme tell ya' it was the most gorgeous gown I ever did see--military braid but a plungin' neckline--ooh, so...ya see? It was in the later cold war era--I loved the message in that gown. Culture/ history/fashion

Anon II, welcome to the Porch

We await IMANOT's response

Romany Angel, love yore new look!
Thank fer the kind words!

Gnomeself Be True said...

First, seeing a woman naked is like climbing a mountain. You could get a helicopter to take you to the top, but the climb makes the view much sweeter.
So, yes, I'm all for leaving something to the imagination.

Because I am a conservative, I would not think of dictating the right or appropriate level of dress or adherence to fashion to anyone.
The point on appearances being judged cuts in both directions. If I see someone wearing shoes that cost more than a car payment, I judge that person to be frivolous and lacking in a reliable sense of priorities. No one has to agree with that assessment to make me happy and I almost certainly would not even share that impression with anyone.
Of course I would not advocate sweat pants at a funeral. You'd have to have very expensive shoes on to think I'd propose something like that. If I attend a funeral wearing $1000 shoes from New and Lingwood, am I being more respectful? Are you seriously checking out shoes while loved ones mourn their loss?
I never said that what a person wears does not reflect what is underneath. I'm just saying that extravagant excess and devotion to fashion says as much as indifference...and what it says is no more flattering.

fishy said...

My goodness Aunty Belle...you sure knows how to git your bloggin buddies engaged! It were a very fine posting. Good information delivered with humor is, generally speaking, a winner. You does it better'n most so my Dache is off to you.

Bout this here iamnot person, I don't reckon I understand her too well. I've been thinking right along that a person surely can have BOTH style and substance, not one over t'other. Sometimes, in that three second rule you were a mentionin, the style IS the first clue to the substance within.
( specially if they have bad posture and no eye contact)
If a person is makin a misstatement wif theys style... why would the blaming be affixed to others for the misreading?

I think everbody likes getting a surprise package from time to time but sometimes that package is a telling us maybe it's one of them nasty surprises instead of a fine one.
An one more thing, you can have style without money or fopishness. You also can have principles without looking like the under the bridge people.

Gnomeself Be True said...

If you think I'm a "she" you really don't know me. :-)

"An one more thing, you can have style without money or fopishness. You also can have principles without looking like the under the bridge people."

I agree with this completely. It is excess that I don't care for.

Jenny said...

well, my "outfit" of choice is typically Levi's and a t-shirt (Gee, I love the PNW!) so even though I'm female (hee-hee to Iamnot) I typically feel as lost as a man when it comes to fashion. That's why I depend on my Fashion-esta Friend Moi (and you) for help. As Troll said, this post is also full of history so I loved it. The comments are great too.

moi said...

But that's my point, exactly, Iamnot. What is "excessive"? Certainly, I think it's utterly stupid for someone to pay $1,000 for a pair of shoes if they can't afford it, if it's to the exclusion of their primary financial obligations (housing, food, gasoline), or they have to go into debt to make the purchase. But if they can afford it? Who cares? If they flaunt it, who cares?

And, no, I do not equate class or quality with cost. I write for a living. Therefore I make, oh after all is said and done, about 50 cents an hour. I'm a dedicated budget fashionista.

I can also admire fashion without having to have it. Because I think it enters, and here's something no one has really explored, the realm of art. Would you, for instance, have had Frank Lloyd Wright reel himself in on Falling Water because it's just too excessive? If not, do you appreciate its beauty any less because you cannot purchase it?

The Java Junkie said...

Aunty, we're hosting a live web chat tonight in honor of the premiere of Top Chef NYC. We'd love for you to sit on our porch for a spell! (All are welcome!)

Steve said...

As objects of art, I guess I have a hard time arguing with you. I just prefer art I don't have to dry clean.
I don't care how rich you are. If you just bought a pair of $1000 shoes, you just wasted at least $800. That says something about you...to me anyway.

darkfoam said...

did you know that the medieval codpiece was used for modesty's sake? i didn't. i just googled that info. medievel men wore hose which fit tightly and was open at the crotch. i did know those renaissance codpieces were a fashion statement. they were decorated, padded, embellished. henry the VIII, i believe, was quite fond of them.

Jenny said...

my whole idea of the fashion world was destroyed at a young age when working for my father (customs house agent.) I saw the actual factory invoices for expensive jeans/etc on their way to Bloomingdale's and low end retailers too. The schnizz came from the same factory, with nearly the same cost... what makes it $$$?

Well, we know the answer.

Unknown said...

Thank you for coming by my blog.

I am very pleased that male high heels never caught on.

While I agree that women should dress in a way that leaves a little to the imagination, sometimes (on a very rare occasion) I don't want to do too much imagining if you know what I mean. :-)

Aunty Belle said...

Iamnot Puddin',
I'se yanked in two--I is wif ya on over doin' the dress up thang--I'se more into he less is more camp, but I is SO tired of ill dressed people whose lack of grooming is offensive.

Folks, we'uns had a big campaign 30 years ago to keep the highways clean an' litter in garbage cans--a keep America Beautiful campaign...we need to have a new Keep Americans Beautiful sequel--YA ' doan need to be a fashion plate to dash out fer milk (beer?), but doan wear no greasy torn stained rags that hurt mah eyes...

hey--youse hot on a cool idea--a whole bidness! A budget fashionista!! YA could chage 100 bucks per person to take 2-3 at a time for a 2 hour instructional foray into budget fashions--pays better'n us hacks git, an you'd beautify America!!!

Sarge Stone,
hee hee, the squirrely fashions!

Foamy!! Hey you!

That is veddy veddy intersetin' fashion history. Tell us more...

A.B., Pumpkin, hidy .

I hear ya on that --when ya see what that stuff is really costin' vs. what we pays--oh mah, it ruins ya'. I goes to market about ever'other year--whar buyers buy...ruins ya fer retail shoppin'.

hapy ya came pu in yore two cents--
reckon most fellas is thrilled in nikes, not Mui mui heels!

h said...

1) We need Aunty Belle to settle the Cracker versus Redneck question in brief at TTR. Especially the Geography part of the conundrum.

2) I couldn't find the City Slicker versus Boudreaux sort of joke. But am posting a "Boudreaux versus Texans" sort.

3) I will be wearing an age-stained authentic TAMPA BAY BANDITS cut-off T-shirt to the outdoor part of the 80s party. And I'll be FAR more comfortable than the people sporting the Duran/Duran look etc...

One day, Boudreaux was sitting on his porch and a truck drove up to Boudreaux's house and a man stepped out. The man introduced himself to Boudreaux, told Boudreaux that he was from Texas, and that he was getting some information about land in the area.
The Texan said, "Mr. Boudreaux, how much land do you have here where you live?"

Boudreaux said, "Mais, I have about two acres."

The Texan said, "That's not much land. Back in Texas where I'm from, it takes me just about all day to drive my truck down my driveway to my house."

Boudreaux thinks about what the Texan said for a while and then responds, "Yeah, I used to have a truck like dat."

Aunty Belle said...

Boudreaux got him a Cracker gal.The next time the Texas land scout drove up in Boudreaux's yard to ask directions on how to git back out of the swamp, he seen the pretty miss and proceeded to flirt by insultin' her choice in men.

"Now baby, that no account Boudreaux boy ain't got what a filly like you needs."

She done smiled like Mona Lisa an said, "Why sir, I'se a woman wif' simple taste, an' mah Sweet Boudreaux is jes' about right."

Texas Talker squinted at her and in his best husky voice he say,

"Come along with me to Texas and I'll show you the sights. I'll set you up so fine on my 500 acre Double D spread."

"Well, thanky, fer the offer, but Boudreax and mah brother jes' bought a patch in Texas, and we's goin' ter see it directly."

Texas Talker threw back his haid and laughed and laughed. "Well, now, pretty miss, whatever patch of dirt old Boudreaux could buy cain't be much. How many acres he got?"

Cracker Miss, smiled mischievously an' say, "Uh, not too much, jes' 40 acres. But it's a start."

Texas Talker roared, "Why darlin'! I have more that ten times what that sorry good fer nuthin' Bourdreax is showin' you. You'd be a fool to pass me up, Honey. What's Boudreaux callin' his place?

Cracker Miss blinked slowly an' said in her longest drawl, "Downtown Dallas."

h said...

That's a great Boudreaux story, Aunty. But you've got me all riled up with your definition of "Cracker". But I'll give you a chance to make amends when you do your thorough post on the matter.

sparringK9 said...

clearly you missed the chappelle show where prince, the rock god of short stature and last male to wear high heels, beat the pants off chappelles team in a game of basketball. while wearing high heels no less.

like other bullshite feminist ideas, the notion of freedom as being synonymous with trashily underclothed has been a disaster for women, in particular younger women.

now in addition to impressing potential mates with your tremendous earning power you must also have spectacular T and A a dn showcase them in overpriced jeans and/or booty shawts and a variety of sparkly tops. truly a step backwards.

americans are some of the slobbiest people on the face of earth. sweat pants as street wear is directly responsible for the decline of western civilization and the uglyfiying of the landscape. by now, my disdain of "airport travel wear" is widely known, but the point may be made again: it shows a total lack of respect and charity to others who must travel in your company - and sadly see too much of you while captive in a holding pen.

to mois point: lovely fashion is like art: it isnt necessary to live, but it adds so much to life. though i cannot afford designer wear, i am delighted when i score a piece at the Goodwill. they tend to be well made, with good materials and often have timeless appeal. whether it is worth its original price is just an agreement between the buyer and the maker.

Jenny said...

amen to Moi and K9.

My Mother told me when I was young that as long as my clothes were of quality, cleaned and ironed, that it didn't matter how many clothes I owned... but to buy classics and wear them until they wore out.

I still wear my "good" clothes when traveling.

Aunty Belle said...

Pleased that ya liked mah cajun joke. Stay tuned fer the Cracker-Redneck face-off.


I'se WONDERIN whar' ya was--as usual, ya throwed a punch-heh heh. Big point fer Aunty is that it is "lack of charity!" Eggs-actly. Foks, we gfotta look at that...c'mon.

Yore mama is one smart lady. Aunty learnt that too--I do have much fashion in may closet, a few classics, mostly old. NExt time I'se in an airport, I'se lookin fer somebody in they good clothes--mebbe it'll be YOU!

Malinda777 said...

Being 45, ya wouldn't think I had a clue 'bout old school...thang is...I was raised by folks born in 1898 & 1913 & married. Mama Ann & Papa Bill on a poor dirt farm in West Texas.

I was born in 1962...so's when I was young and cute 'bout 1976 or so I wanted to sport short skirts & tight jeans...OH HELL NO! In junior high school, my Mama still sewed my clothes (then it was still cheaper), and damn if she didn't buy that dastardly double knit material (comparable to sponges) with hideous patterns, BIG flowers, & sew my shirt & pants of the same material!

I wanted "chic"...I wanted to be "like the others"... My Mama & Daddy told me flat out... (Daddy) You don't like the clothes youre Mama makes for you...get on out there and get youreself a job and buy youre own! I did.

I love them for their ways though and they gave me the conservative gumption I have today even though "they" called themselves Democrats :)

My Mama would make me put my arms down to my side...the longest finger (the bird finger) was the MINIMUM shortness any skirt could be.

When I got into junior high & high school...we had stairs. My skirts were allowed to be as short as my finger...but boys could see up them stairs! My mama SEWED & MADE me little shorts to wear OVER my panties so's the fellas wouldn't see up my dress! My how times have changed!

My daddy taught me when I got datin' age that what's left to a man's imagination is always the most excitement of the evening! He was right! I've been married twice and raised two boys to grown and I KNOW it's still true and I taught my boys the same thing.

When I became of "womanly age" my Mama made me go to the doctor! For WHAT? Not SICK? Old folks use to do that! Our old family doctor gave me the woman checkup, made sure my cherry was in tact (I think that's why the folks used to do that)...and then gave me the marriage speech much like a preacher would.

Doctors & Preachers used to have a lot in common. MY DOCTOR as a young woman told me that when I grew older as a woman and became a wife, that I should always try to present myself as a lady. Work days wif man is different... but when the man hasn't seen you for some hours (women used to be able to stay home)...try to be pleasantly presentable to your man when he comes home...it's important to a fella.

Look nice, smell nice, be pleasant, wear something nice and a man will adore you forever he told me :)

Again...my how times have changed!

Sorry Aunty I leave such LONG comments on your blog, but you must be the most brilliant writer of our time :)

You remind me in your style of Mark Twain and I loved his style :)

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